Blog posts that provide encouragement for marriage and family success.

Cut the "Sugar Talk": How to pray before going into a difficult conversation

Difficult conversations

It's easy to fall into the trap of fighting or arguing with someone. It's natural for us to defend our opinions and defend the things we love. So sometimes when we are in conflict with those whom we love, it's tempting to make a list of all the ways that person "gets it wrong." The truth is, this type of negative perspective can ruin relationships before they have a chance to grow.

Praying before a conversation is essential for relationship success. When we pray ahead of time, and also pray for ears to hear, we are more likely to focus on God and the other person than ourselves and our message. When we focus on God and the other person, we are more likely to engage in good listening skills. Together, prayer and listening skills will help us build a stronger relationship.

It's not always easy to pray, but it's worth it.

beach background with words, "cut the sugar talk, how to pray before going into a difficult conversation" and write.speak.relate logo

Why to Pray

There are several reasons why praying before a conversation is essential for relationship success:

  • Prayer helps you focus on what you're saying and listening to your conversation partner. It also helps you be more present, which helps you connect with your conversation partner better. This can make conversations more enjoyable and productive.

  • Prayer shows that you care about the person who you're talking to, which can help them feel more comfortable and willing to be honest with you during the conversation.

  • Once someone knows that they are being prayed for, they will often open up more easily because they feel like they have someone on their side who cares about them even if things don't go perfectly during the conversation.

How to Pray

There are several simple steps to praying before a difficult conversation. Prayer is really just talking to God. And it’s totally appropriate to pray for success with a conversation or relationship. Try this format if you don’t have one you like already:

  1. Acknowledge God's presence over the conversation.

  2. Humble yourself before God.

  3. Ask for forgiveness.

  4. Ask for wisdom.

  5. Look at the conversation from the other person's perspective.

  6. Ask God to be your means of communication.

  7. Seek to bless the other person.

  8. Listen to the other person and learn from them.

It Looks Like This

Heavenly Father, I know that you are the Master Communicator. You have already gone ahead of my friend/partner and I into this conversation. You have already paved the way for our relationship to improve from our time together. I humbly come to you for wisdom and direction. Please forgive me for my pride in thinking my perspective is the right one, or the only one. Please help me to see from his/her perspective…to really understand him/her. Please help me to understand what he/she really needs…to see the world and the situation from his/her experiences. I want to know what he/she wants from this conversation. As you did for Moses, I ask you to give me the words I need. Put the right words in my mouth and set a guard over my mouth to prevent words I shouldn’t say. I pray for your continued blessings on {name of person} - I pray for a close relationship with you, and for you to pave the way for success in his/her life. Please open my ears to what he/she has to say and know that just as you are directing my words, so you are directing his/hers. Please bring us together in YOU to find a solution that glorifies you. In Jesus’s name, Amen.

So, that’s it!

Before you have a difficult conversation, spend some time in prayer. Don't just ask God to "help" you with it; ask Him to go with you and give you the strength to break through any obstacles that may come up. Then, when the conversation becomes difficult, remember that you can only succeed if God is with you—and know that He is.


Prayer before difficult conversations can make a big difference in how they go.

❓ What relationship needs the most prayer before you talk? Scroll to the very bottom and let us know. Mine is definitely my marriage!

💝 Andrea